You don’t have to LOVE being pregnant
From the moment that double line shows up, society seems to expect you to float into this mystical, earth-mother state of pure gratitude and be glowing like a firefly on a warm summer’s night. People ask how you’re doing, usually waiting for you to gush about the miracle of life. But if your honest, unfiltered thought is, “Actually, I feel like an absolute garbage bin fire,” the guilt creeps right in.
So let’s clear the air: You do not have to love being pregnant. In fact, it is completely fine if you actively dislike it.
You can love that you’re pregnant but not have to love the pregnancy itself.
Pregnancy isn't a 40-week spa retreat. For so many of us, it’s a relentless 24/7 physical and emotional marathon. Maybe you’re battling morning sickness that actually lasts all day, for all 3 trimesters, horrid pelvic pain, exhaustion, or sudden on-set prenatal anxiety. Maybe work is chaotic, money is tight, relationships are tricky, your MIL is trying to become your midwife or just general life circumstances are heaping on way too much stress. Carrying the heavy weight of real life while your body is growing a brand new human from scratch is deeply exhausting.
Not enjoying the journey does not make you an ungrateful mum, and don’t let social media make you think otherwise. It just means you’re human. You don’t have to romanticise the ride; it’s 100% okay to just keep your eyes locked on the reward at the finish line. You love your baby, you just don’t love the incubation process, and that is entirely valid.
While you're in the thick of it, please please do yourself a massive favour and put your social media on a strict diet.
Mute the accounts showing beautiful production heavy morning routines in wallace cotton sheets and hand crafted ceramic coffee mugs sourced from the hills of japan, and talking about how magical and connected they feel. Trust me: half of the people claiming to be “blessed and glowing” are violently dry-heaving into a bucket the second they turn the camera off. Curate your feed so it reflects reality, not someone else’s click grab. Try and sway your algorithm to more arts and crafts or puppies if you can.
Instead of pressuring yourself to “cherish every moment,” just focus on stringing together little silver linings to get through each week. An icy treat when nothing else stays down, an absurd fortress of pillows, bingeing your favourite comfort show, or getting a free out to say "no" to plans so you can lie flat on the couch.
Write a journal if you think that could help, get your feelings out, or find a friend who’s been there already to lend an empathetic ear. Or an online group, reddit is a pretty supportive place if you word your question right, and if its not, just block or delete!
You don’t have to love the pregnancy to be an incredible mama. Just take it one week, one day, or one hour at a time. You're doing the hard yards now, and that super cute, cheek squishy tiny human at the end is going to make it all worth it.
